Work Less, Travel More, Laugh More and Find Time To Give Back.

Stiffling heat has stunted my ability to sleep.
Have taken refuge in the library.
Had plenty of energy for my night shift - but tonight will be a different story.
2010 is hours away.
One of my clients asked me to make a list of my resolutions(!)
Work less, travel more, laugh more and find time to give back.
These could be teased out a little..................................
Work 3 days a week - Experience more space and not have to rush through the days.
Travel the world, just about to do this! So exciting. This is just a taster for things to come.
?Living and working OS.
Investigate OS options - get onto this Jenny.
Laugh? More chill out time with friends and family. Go to the beach, walk, play games.
Beaches far and wide, but hey Port Willunga is pretty damn good.
Giving back - volunteer with environmental groups, amnesty, uniting care justice, op shop, library - there are lots of options here - volunteer abroad.
It is funny how things topple out of your mind.
Cheers.

Living on Cherries

It has taken at least 10 minutes to log onto this site, on the lap top-frustration.
Living on Cherries, post Christmas 09.
Way behind with plans for Overseas.
I have one day free!
Looking forward to getting some cold weather gear and having a decent latte.
Was reading some old writing I did when I was 15 - hilarious.
I had developed my own magazine as editor and publisher.
My readership was all of my home ie my brother and sister - the address for competitions was my bedroom! Time goes by and I am still setting up competitions and writing away.
But to be an editor.....................................

The church of the future.....................

The church of the future is in your lounge room, cafe and park.
Could use the church building - but redesign so you can see everyone.
Of course this is not a radical idea(!)
The question I pose is how to structure this - so as everyone is a part of it.
When something runs its course - what takes its place.
By the by I need to start working on a worship plan for Sunday - but I need space.
Did an extra night duty last night and am feeling surprisingly well.
Just booked in four new tyres on our best car - so there goes that extra shift money.
Also been browsing hotels for the OS trip - Riga, Hong Kong, Washington - reading reviews, looking at photos - think I have made some decisions.
Cheers.

Christmas News, Blues & Views.

Christmas news, blues and views.
I have found my way to a computer that is away from all the hustle and bustle.
News - our minister has had a baby girl - the miracle of a new life.
A longstanding member of the church has had a stroke - it is hard to see someone struggle.
My sister has just visited and we had the best time eating, drinking and shopping.
Blues - Haven't had a spare minute, been able to do any singing, choir, end of year cellabration or even listen to the carols night.
School report - could have been a lot better.
Work - frantic pressure, lots of clients who do NOT like Christmas.
Heat - it's coming back......................
Christmas - It's nearly here and I am spending too much.
Views - I need a key to the hall - always seem to be borrowing one for the tree display, quarry market etc.
Copenhagen is hanging in the balance - please pray for a clear resolution to take away and banish the skeptics into a cave.
Retirement - Heard a man talking on The View - he was an anchor man on ABC TV USA - Who stated a friend of his was never allowed home for lunch as a retiree - I must remember that one for the other half.
Cards - I am perpetually behind with this, yet I seem to write loads. To do - neighbours and visit & organize director stuff. Amnesty letter/cards.
Children - It's about letting go.

Not wired up for the 6 am starts

Fortification - soy latte and savoury muffin.
It has been all go today.
I have managed to negotiate a later start to work tomorrow - my system can only handle so many 6 o'clock wake ups - I am not wired for 6am.
Have had so much criticism coming my way, unwell people, cranky people, stressed people.
Processing how I can do better with all this.
Time to go home...............................................

Family is all.

I am NOT enjoying this week at all.
It is hard to find satisfaction when progress seems minimal.
Things seem to be in total retrograde.
Looking forward to my time at Take Ten tonight for some meditation.
I don't want answers - cos there is no complete answer.
Right now I would trade my spot in a heartbeat to be winging it to London.
But that is many weeks away.
Looking in to investigating options on that side of the world.
Books sustain me,
friends support me,
my dog loves me,
- this I know,
my faith runs deep,
my family is all.
Thank you.

Spearmint Choc Top investigations

While sitting in the cinema a while back eating the said spearmint choc top, I felt like a nail hit one of my molars. Resulting in pain and the gradual realsiation I needed a visit to the dentist.
Something else to fit into my life.
I am finding it very difficult to write at home and don't have loads of time at work - being as I was acting manager for a week and things were needing to be done(!)
So here I am in the local library with 29 minutes to burn.
I have made a reservation for the double birthday dinner.
Jaz is 21! and Julian is 18 and at schoolies as we speak.
For Alphutte resturant on a set menu.
Grandma is coming and Jasmine's new boyfriend - David.
Have got practically no info on David other than he is a third year art student.
Need to do a proper invite and a further round of phone calls.
Travel - where is my passport??
Need to get passports sorted and further bookings made, plus cash passport.
This week it will all happen(!)
Program for Christmas festival - some fall out heard this morning following organizational blunder about using the hall, no doubt I will hear more about this.
King Lear - Are we speaking the same language?! I read a synopsis yesterday, which I should have read before the play.
Someone two computers down is talking as she is typing.
Also meant to be getting things ready for an AGM & BBQ next Sunday.
Invited to a housewarming tommorrow at Port Willunga.
November has almost slipped by with its Jacaranda's and hay bales, Valedictory speeches and record heat.
Final round of TV shows and reports that need to be written at work.
I guess it will all get done.

Willunga Christmas Tree Festival - record entries!

Christmas Tree Festival preparations are in full swing for 09.
This year there are so many new entries - Wow!
Children, families, businesses, wineries - I can't wait to see what people come up with.
I have also noted more collective input.
Thoughts about what to put on a tree - and how this fits in with what Christmas is about for them.
Giving to others is a theme that comes through louder and louder.
People who have been visiting and thought I would like to contribute.
One lady today has even offered to cook for the stall.
Radio websites etc are my next port of call.
Did some libraries yesterday - putting in fliers.
Will I be brave and call the Messenger?
It has been a lot of work in the past - and I wonder if it was really worth it.
Perhaps I will tell them that?!
Need to finalize the list of contributions this week.
Getting the 'girls' geared up for our meringue tree - will look divine I'm sure.

Misty eyes with John Denver.

hello again, trying a different font.
Trying for ages to upload ix to Canon - unsuccessfully - but I havde left it to the eleventh hour.
Meant to report I indulged in some folk music last weekend - which seems light years away.
Neptune Rising, a duo, who happened to be in Chrystina's when I was there, after the worship get together.
Glorious harmonies - I'm Sorry my John Denver being the highlight - gets me all misty eyed.
Halloween ghouls have just been calling.
Finished reading the Alan Bennett book 'A Life like Other people's' As with many writers his history is mapped out by his upbringing - the themes of his childhood written into every fibre of his life.
A very rewarding read.

Living by the shift

The system is blocked, it won't let me on.
So I can't write - well not enough.
How can they block me from blogging?
Surely it is a professional duty??!
My letters in this Month's Women's Weekly & Adelaide Magazine.
Diverse subject range-:
Doc Marten's & Auge resturant.
Snap shots in my memory...........................
Red poppies by the driveway, blazing red. So exciting, were they there yesterday?
They must love the sun, which has been punishing, a total shock after a pleasant spring.
Zuchini & lemon muffins - worth finding the recipe.
A near empty cinema, the giant screen, a personal viewing of Queen Victoria.
Somehow Queen Victoria seems a touch hollywood.
Have movie tickets to Julia & Julia + Boys are Back - both on the same day - so will get my boys to see the boys flick.
One day remaining to do a Tafe enrollment, a photo comp & get a newsletter out.
Book club rescheduled to another week - nevermind that I have rescheduled my roster to work a day shift every month to get to the other night.
It is so hard to fit every thing in when you live by the shift.
Christmas Festival gearing up.
Lots of positive feedback about the poster - the pink ribbon gumboots.
Make more calls, arrangements & connections.

Too much stuff.

The cleaner should get the sack at my house or pay docked - oh it's me(!)
Right, incredibly behind with all things domestic.
The house perpetually looks like a bomb has it it - such a wonderful expression.
Too much furniture and goods ie rubbish.
Either need another house to store it all in or it needs to be culled in half.
The 21st Century dilemma - too much stuff.

Rhetoric Vulnerability & Trusteeship - Waving a Magic Wand

Think tanks
Haigh's & Imprints.
Caramel fudge & Alan Bennett's book 'A Life Like Other People's'.
Can't resist books and fudge in no particular order.
Brain swimming with ideas following the Rights, Responsibilities & Rhetoric conference.
The legal and mental health issues of making decisions to, for and with people.
Capacity & consent.
Decisions, decisions, decisions.
Sometimes I wonder why I work in this field.
It is so damn hard. There is so many divurgent opinions.
Going on to the launch of the State Theatre Company's 2010 season.
Blessings.

Debating the questions of freedom and the long trip home.

Freeeeee!
Free at last.
Read part of Martin Luther King's famous speech in the train.
The gift of lousy times........................
Rights, Responsibilities & Rhetoric.
Debating the questions of freedom.
Waited an hour for a train, then another hour home.

Three nights on

Honey recipes - The Secret Life of Bees. Got a recipe that requires apple sauce and coffee - have to try it!
Curiously awake following three nights on. Hope to stay awake until the evning and get back in line.
Call Mulcher.
Call Marty.
Call Marian.
Call Michelle
Do Take Ten.
Visit travel agent.
Buy food.
Just bought some new bed pillows - European style. The pillows are cheap, but they slug you big time for the pillow cases - $100 all up(!)
Have been to Mt Compass to get pick up a friend of my Jerry, take them to Tatachilla, then on to the cinema. Off to PAtricias for a $10 all day breakfast and tea.
Travel on to Target and pillow frenzy.
At the new Noarlunga library renovations now.
Then to cinema, Seaford shops.
Jerry to apply for work there.
Home, dinner, take ten.
Sleep.
Just browsing through a book on grief - to review.
Plus Bright Shiny Morning - quite depressing scenarios so far. Hope it is not all so bleak.
Should be titled Bleak dawning.

Experiment your heart out

I have been locked out of the internet yet again on my work computer.
It happens so often that I know the IT people well...................
Still it did focus me into other areas.
It is about hitting that wall about 4am - it is nearly impossible to be productive then.
10 mins until the library closes.
Things to get my teeth into overnight.
Hearing voices write up.
Sevice planning
Photo comp - experiment your heart out!

The Art of Life

Afternoon sun on the windows
Cool water hitting skin
Melodies from black and white days
A chance smile
A parent cradles a wriggling baby
Sky that reaches up forever
A knitted cable pattern
Encounters with a jumping dog
Australian voices in a faraway land
Walking along the track of wilderness
The ice box rainforest collages
Imprints of paintings
Birthday cakes and a green cloak floating by
A camera fixes it into history
For my sins

Bob girl

New Bob hair
The life & times of Anna Wintour on show
The Mortlock building on North Terrace
A sense of place - Hugh Mackay - Has he been writing on this for the last five years and I've just found out about it?
Had a conversation with him last night - his next research topic & book is on 'What makes us tick?'Following on from his talk entitled A Sense of place.
Had a wonderful day
Having spent 15 odd years having little done to my hair, it's time........!
Things I need to research-:
Royal College of Nurses - grants and membership
Masters courses for 2010
OS Travel in 2010
Things I don't need-:
Entering lots of competitions for the sake of it
Reading lots of trash, well lets try and cull it a bit, okay
Cleaning bathrooms
Oraganizing other people's finances

Goolge restored - connected again

Have been without google on the computer for days.
Now restored.
Hallelujah!

The inner and outer experience.................

Emily Dickinson - Much Madness is divinest Sense
Much Madness is divinest Sense --
To a discerning Eye --
Much Sense -- the starkest Madness --
'Tis the Majority
In this, as All, prevail --
Assent -- and you are sane --
Demur -- you're straightway dangerous --
And handled with a Chain --

Searching and writing up a summary on the spirituality & Health conference, found this poem, which seems to come out at me.

Listening to consumers, asking questions

Writings of people in their life battles.
Questions to ask.
When do you feel alive?
What makes a good day for you.
What is the bset thing about being here?
What is the worst part of being here?

Winter beckons

Round the world in minutes on my computer.
Think I need the support of a travel agent on this one.
Winter beckons.
Snow filled landscapes.
Big overcoats, hats and mittens.
Bring it on in 2010.

Give me a sugar hit - NOW

Craving sugar - ice cream, biscuits.
My whole body wants a hit.
On other topics -:
My tax return hasn't been lodged - found out yesterday, ?why, has apparently been at the bottom of the pile - needing to work out the education rebate - but that is why I get an accountant to do these things.
Computer was locking me out for several days - bugger.
A bit of the hot flush symptoms resurfacing - but am trying to keep them at bay.
To do fire telephone tree and working bee reminder.
Card to long term WGV resident.
Flowers to a friend who has been diagnosed with ovarian cancer.
Christmas poster - need it completed ASAP.

Memoirs of loss - Shimmer

Just finished Shimmer. I seem to be reading a lot of books about grief. Memoirs, all beautifully written. The year of magical Thinking, The Waiting Room, Through a Glass Darkly and now Shimmer. I feel I need to make sense of my own losses and feelings of powerlessness and grief. The slow decline of my father and the earlier loss of my much loved mother. There is something about Caroline Jones and her words and fear - siting that feeling of 'living beside an abotoir'. It is that feeling of watching your parents die - there is that wanting to look away, but being unable to.

How to live in 10 easy lessons.

How to live in 10 easy lessons.
1. Take a rest day once a week-: Don't cook, clean or do the laundry on this day, preferably a Sunday - the sabbath - the day of rest. This is my prayer. (But why do I feel so guilty when I do this?) I worked with someone who had a rule that she never cooked on the weekend.
2. Don't over tax your body with toxins-: ie alcohol, bad fats, dairy products, wheat products ie biscuits, bread and cakes and last but not least caffiene. This is nie on impossible, but try, will you(!)
3. Reflect and meditate each day-: Pray, listen to God's voice, often in the stillness that is very precious. Subtitled - quiet time, down time, time out or
4. Water - Everywhere, to drink in and to feel on your senses.
5. Find your sacred place-: Your boat on the water of chaos, your refuge in the storm we call life - is it the daily grind. Getting away from the grindhouse - yes you can.
6. Look after your skin - sunscreen
7. Now get moving, walk it out.
8. Get into the fresh air, even a nice chair in the sunshine.
9. Write-: write about everything, to everyone. Absorb it and put it back out there. A born writer is happier to observe than to be in the thick of it.
10. Have friends-: Talk, phone and laugh, whether they are your family or not, they will keep you sane.

Time stood still....................

Knives in Hens in review-:
This is a slow going concern.
The scripting and staging are frugal in nature.
This may suit the era of the pre industrial landscape but time seems to stand still.
The dialogue is quite lyrical and poetic in parts. Particularly when the woman’s knowledge of the pen and the words in her head are revealed.
The characters are not likeable or engaging, this may be another reason the audience is not drawn into their world.
Went to the Pancake Parlor afterwards, which was quite mediocre.

Travel lust

Travel lust.
Want to be seeing new places.
Having new expereinces.
?? A Nothern hemishpere escape to London and the continent ie Ireland, Scotland.
Plus stop over.
?Round the world tix?
?Jasmine and I.
Boys meet us there??
Lots & lots of moulah.

Every day is an opportunity - isn't it?

Create your own survey.
Design your own Christmas poster?
Enter lots of photo comps.
Write your own memoir.
Email as many people as you can think of in one day.
Learn a new song.
See a new street.
Go to a new cafe.
Try a new coffee.
Watch a new show.
See a new film.
Find a new cinema.
Find a new rose.
Hear a new riff.
Meet a new mentor.

I can see for miles and miles..................................

My mind feels clearer.
So good to have my energy back.
I feel like I want to do things again.
Last day for poster entries for the Christmas Tree Festival.
Toying with the idea of creating a blog specifically for the Willunga Christmas Tree Festival.
What do you think??

Writing makes me feel good

Public Encounters.
Encountering................
Every time you greet someone, it is an opportunity.
My mind is finally beginning to work again.
My head feels clearer.
I have been writing and that always makes me feel good.

How to get to nearly 50 and still be undecided about nearly everything...........

Filmss to be seen-:
Balibao
September Issue
Beautiful Kate
District 9
Young Victoria

Now- jobs
Find a new career..........
Travel around the world.............
Write a book titled-:
How to get to nearly 50 and still be undecided about nearly everything..............

A big mushroom in a paper bag in my shopping cart

Made my selection
the big mushroom and baby spinach,
guiness sausages & hass avacados
choc wedges & bega cheese
I seem to be spending lots on the basics.
Winter is in full roar and I absolutely love it.

Letting it in and letting it out - Good mental health

Got some antibiotics and am facing the reality that I, in fact, after all these years, might actually have hayfever. It may the underlying cause of these horrible sinusitis episodes.

They really bring me down - to a screaming halt in fact.

I thought it was diet related or just getting run down.

Could it be a combination of this?

I have always, always denied having hayfever, maybe I need antihistimines and/or something like them.

Just finished reading two books - plenty of reading going on.

'Through a glass darkly' is Caroline Jones describing in quite refreshing detail the grief and truama she endures while watching her father die slowly in hospital.

The anger she buryies.

I can relate to burying anger - it is what I know. Keeping the peace, staying strong, not focusing on oneself, not letting anyone know if you are in pain or distressed or not coping, anxious etc.

There are some excellent comments in the Appendix.

One from the Intensive Care Specialist - still don't think the medical profession really get what an advanced directive is, if someone has gone to the trouble of writing one and getting it legal, the least it should be is honoured. But the medicos think they know better.

He does raise the valid point of the impact of sad events and stories on gthose exposed on them.

Mal McKissock describes the concept of taking it in and letting it out, for counsellors, this is essential for maintaining their mental health and avoiding burnout.

Can you really avoid burnout?

Sometimes your psyche is overloaded- and you either drink too much wine, make phone calls to someone or start blogging(!) Praying is also a refuge. When I do get to go to a quiet church, I find this peaceful.

Slowly regaining my strength.

Trying not focus on jealousy, envy and pettiness.

They are not me. I am a pretty accepting and serene person most of the time.

Qualities I have in me and must be absorbed from my parents.

Thankyou mum and dad.

Once was lost is now found - found my way back to this blog I thought I'd lost - ask me how?
Keep on looking.............................

Head feels like it is full of concrete

Exhaustion
Full of yuykky green junk
need some gutsy antibiotics
need to see a GP
SOON

Posting a belated comment amongst the haze............

Could do with a coffee.

Life is okay.

Working through issues re: community garden space.

Gearing up for Fire Safe Street Walk.

Getting organized re: pamphlet and signage for church.

Finished - A Million Little Pieces.

Nearly finished it when I decided to google the author.

Found out that there has been controversy regarding the authenticity of the memoir.
Now editing this post a few days later. Having got caught up in work conversations and some futile attempts at keeping some people awake and engaged.

Do people realise I do full time shift work?

Forgot there are school info sessions and year 12 and beyond decisions we should be making.
Open days we could not attend.
Money that still needs to come my way.
An expression of interest meeting about McLaren Vale Carols that was on tonight I believe.
An Almond Blossom thankyou BBQ I never got to on Monday.
Photos I have yet to email re: said games @ Almond Blossom.
Sisters of Abundance that I continually run into, I always give the same excuse - shift work.
Do people realise I do full time shift work?
Goodnight and Goodluck.

Sinusitis is my downfall

Could feel life becoming foggier and foggier on the weekend.
Made a big effort to get to the girl's brekkie - which I loved, on Saturday.
Then off to work we go.
Really, really struggled on Sunday morning.
Had to get things organized for the two days off I was having.
Collapsed totally when I got home - to bed.
Dosed myself up all Monday.
All of us missed out on attending church on Sunday - grief issues already re: minister leaving at the end of the year.
Cancelled a coffee catch up re: festival @ my fav - 3 monkeys.
Cancelled attending a nurses meeting - tried to put in an apology but doubt it got through.
Had to cancel the theatre tickets for Sat night and rescheduled for Tuesday evening, too under par to attend either day.
Overdue with putting in a proforma for uniting church brochere did today.
Needing to liaise with CFS today re: Community Fire Safe Street Walk.
Needing to send out letters re: WGV.
Need to write an update on ANF Delegates conference.
Need to write up a spiel on public encounters.
Liaise re; CHRISTMAS TREE FESTIVAL - Poster???
Hub meeting - ?when
Write out last public encounters report
Letter to Irene
Research treatment of clients in city watch house - human rights issue-inhumane treatment.
Need to finish writing up spirituality conference review.
So what I doing blogging?!

Goats Milk Ice Cream anyone?

Demazin, Codral, Dinetap, Sudafed, Rhinacort, Panadol, panadol cold and flu etc etc.
Tis the season to be dosed up................
Slowly clawing back some sense of clarity in my head.
Breakfasting this morning and it was mighty fine.
Talking about all kinds of stuff.
Good turn out despite the cold and flus.
Where to now?
That is what we are all asking in various forms.
My career, my family, my church, my faith, our world.
Partied on last night in Mt Compass, at the Willunga Family Orchestra after party.
The charm of the country cotage that is held together with animals, conversation and the smell of country cooking - goats milk ice cream anyone? Very yummy.
So much so that I ate so much I could hardly think straight(!)

Mechinations of daily life

Son drove to school for the first time today - in the Magna.
Husband still on the sick list - miserable.
Dog over excited - jumping up and scratched cleaner.
All morning cleaning for the cleaner, trying to get things organized - never in front.
Back on deck at work - okay.
Timesheet to do
Footy tips to do
Lots of notes and entries to do
But still I am writing on a blog(!)
Guess I am a hopeless addict.

Year of the Changeling

I have finally started using the lap top in my office/study.
Getting a few in trays for stuff and while I am typing this am avoiding writing letters and proposals etc.
I have dubbed this the 'year of the changeling'.
This is part B of 'nothing is static' blog.
Must be I am meant to see how change is, while trying to keep what I know and knowing this is not going to work.
Jani still miserable in bed with the flu.
Holly dog also moping around.
I guess it is finally time to start doing stuff.

Nothing is Static

Nothing is static.
Violin teacher has split from her husband of 18 years - sad
The studio is for sale - things will change
I am doing full time shift work - exhausting
Singing has been impossible to get to - bugger
New colleagues, totally different culture - strange
Have had more money, spent more money- what budget?!
Partner has resigned from garden work and quarry to do full time nursery work
New hours, regular money, stuff he knows inside out - a blessing
Church minister has resigned to pursue other things - ?What now?
Recruitment and policy sttement is now required - more meetings
Have seen inside the court system and the casualty list is on both sides - Adelaide wanders
Girl's don't meet as regularly - pity
Book club is moving around - okay
Daughter is living away from home - finding her feet
One car totalled, one new one bought - expensive
Neighbourhood issues are more prominent - messy
Where to from here?
Is there any such thing as a quiet life?
A nice glass of rose and a good book....................please.

Rats in the machine

Got stranded on Sunday night in Gouger Street, hazard lights on and waiting for the RAA, got it going for about 2 k's then it gaved out on me again in South Road.
Long wait for a tow to Willunga - four hours gone.
So much for a nice quiet evening reading.
Diagnosis - rodent damage to wiring - who'd haved thought.

Where is my wife??!

About to make a resolution in front of a room full of nursing delegates at the ANF conference 2009. Financial scchlorships to undertake mental health nursing studies.
Don't seem to have got all the writing done that I was contemplating - tonight?
Open days coming up for uni.
Car insurance issues.
Mechanical issues with the car.
Servicing issues with the new car.
Banking issues and on it goes.
Domestic issues ie cleaning & garden & car & bills etc.
Where is my wife??!

The Proposal - Mulitple considerations

Found my way into the ANF library computer room.
Haven't blogged for ages.
A number of headache/hassles over the weekend.
Not enough hours in the day.
Baking? Oh yeah, that didn't happen, spent $11 for some - home baked - donations(!)
Chinese resturant - Concubine - very nice - quirky touches, like a page of the dictonary under the entree dish.
Car decided to stop working on the corner of Gouger & King William - HELP!
Got moving for about 2 K's - then had to get off South Road - towing services required - again.
$100 and most of Sunday night gone.
Was looking forward to writing & reading in the neutral, peaceful surrounds of a hotel room.
Quite a nice hotel room - old fashioned - yes well call me old fashioned.
Anyway, such is life, sigh.....................
Delegates conference.
One speaker down and quite a dull talk - even he admitted that(!)
Proposal for book swap/library, WUC
Proposal for gardening group, WUC
Public Encounters report, WUC
WGV - Read minutes, where are they?
WGV - Write letter regarding gardeners
Year 12 studies subject selection.
Julian - career selection.
Grief stuff
Book club - finish Theft, a love story - very good so far.
Spirituality & Health conference write up
Consider going down to 0.7 a fortnight - what is life, when you are so rushed you can't get to the market, do some gardening, go for a walk etc.

Art, Spirituality, Welbeing, recovery.......................

Having trouble staying focused here....................
Would like to be home in bed.
Spirituality - was told it is not always a good thing?
How does this work.
Are we designed to be selfish - to survive, from a primitive perspective.
So the concept of putting others before yourself is alien.
It is the pleasure principle mixed in with survival.
Have to do a literature review by Saturday and am struggling to find the area to go in.
Art, spirituality, well being, recovery - what works?
Being bleary at the moment is not helping.

Bubble Duty

Up early to get to the Almond Blossom Worship service @ 9.30am.
Ephesians 3: 14 - 21. Beautiful reading.
God surpasses all knowledge.
Did the power point for this, including pix of almond blossom.
Went on to Christina's for a coffee, while watching the parade.
MG's with previous almond blossom queens.
Saw lots of people - Glen and Debbie across the road, Dick flower taking photos, many others.
Including our very own premier - Mike Rann and local member Leon Bignell taking in the sights.
Julian was in the CFS truck and I saw a little smile.
Jerry walked with the violinists.
Tried out the new bakery.
Met up with Uldi & Sue & Co. and they did the rounds of the fair.
Good turn out.
I was then on bubble duty - following a sharing time of our group - the christian community.
Quite rushed as I always knew I had to leave b y 1.30pm.
Here at work now - getting hungry.
Must away...........................................

I love Cairns

Just tried to add a photo I took - I love Cairns sign. Wouldn't attach.
Anyway Cairns is alive with wildlife and hard sell.
Do this, go here, stay here and while we're at it why don't you live here?!
Electric blue butterflies, giant plaited trees, lumbering turtles, darting fishes and wandering casowarys & a beautiful amber coloured robin.
Give me another week at Cape Trib, another day at Kuranda and a boat to cruise the coast - dream on!
Need some more moulah, but think we did well with what we had.
Would like to return in the wet season - no I am not insane, would just appreciate seeing the rainforest - in rain and all lush and thriving.

I saw a turtle under the sea!

Also how could I forget the turtle, lazily swimming about the coral landscape.
The terns on Michaelmas Cay.
The young Casowary that wandered across the road in the Daintree.
Living for now-on the computer in the Hilton.

Rainforests so large they dominate the mind

I wanted rainforests.
They are all around this end of the world.
Lapping up to the reef, sponging about in the mud.
Hiding crocs, butterflies, casowarys and hordes of visitors.
Clear streams, soaring palms, vines & creepers trailing throughout the visage.
There is the world under the sea, the blue staghorns, the colourful fishes & corals, mountain ranges beneath the water.
Cairns -A settlement that has morphed into a massive tourism surge- always seeming to be on overdrive. Is Queensland always on overdrive, amped up, too full of its self?
Here is the itinrary that I recall - just realise we are talking big bikkies. $$$
I did get my buffet brekkies and the absolute thrill of the room serviced each day.
Day one - Arrival in Cairns, Thursday 3pm - lost luggage, taxi to the Hilton. Look around Cairns.
Day two - Friday - Cairns Botanical Gardens walk, 1pm rendevouz with Jan, travdelling North to Barron Gorge and Palm Cove.
Day Three - Saturday- Walk around Cairns - then long walk to HMAS Cairns
Day Four - Sunday - Kuranda railway - Kuranda - heaps of people surging up the main street of Kuranda, buttefly house - Many varieties of butterflies and viewing of the labratory, incubating catepillars.
A bit rushed, then onto the sky rail and bus home. Pix of us on the sky rail- good shots of the boys, but I look concerned.
Day Five - Cascades rainforest with Maris. 1pm bus to Bungee jump, afternoon expereince and Minjin Swing, Jerry, Julian and I. Plenty of pix.
Day Six - Reef tour on Passions, whole day snorkle and dive - long day. More pix opf the boys.
Day Seven - Cape Trib - via Port Douglas & Daintree Village - long day.
Also forgot to bring camera battery charger - major mistake. Also pulled a muscle in my left calf on day @ Botancial gardens, now recovered, me a white blubby woman - in need of a shape up.
Eating out at Mondo's times two, Cairns RSL & Salthouse. Mondo's Souvalaki a standout.
Tired now, early flight home to Willunga & Jaz & Holly Roo.

Butterflies are free

At the Hilton typing a quickblog-in Cairns.
The butterflies are free - well almost, they are in luxury digs in Kuranda.
Pretty little station is still there, surrounded by commercial intersts.
Havde to dash.
St Kilda and Adelaide game on Fox.

Mneumonic Review

Thoughts on Mneumonic - a memory device used to recall something.
Intriguing use of props brings us in to the inner emotional world of family history - we all have one, with the use of a 'plane' tree leaf - there's lots of them outside the Festival Theatre, which were wet and soggy outside. I felt a bit overwhelmed by the diverging threads of the plot - connected, overlapping but just that bit out of reach. Loved the cameos of tourists and scientists et al. Not sure about the chair metaphor Perhaps my head was so full of ideas following The Festival Ideas it was ready to burst(!) The set designs are always amazing at the State Theatre Company and this was no exception. Lots more to unpack - which is the mark of an exceptional play.
Other reviews on the site I plugged into are almost polar opposite ie very glowing or very unsettled/bad ie crap.
I guess it's not for everyone.

Mental Silence vs mental overload - mid conference spiel

I have had a letter published in The Weekend Australian Magazine - related to a joint telling of the story of a father & daughter in their struggle with living with a mental illness.
I wrote off a few letters on a weekend when there were very few residents where I work and I had time to reflect.
Would like more reflection time in my life.
The last few days have been full on with an ideas festival, a state theatre production, work - notes, proposals, problems, church, a conference on spirituality & health and in between all the domestics that have to be done.
When I am in Cairns I plan to do NO cooking or cleaning(!)
Lots of questions. Spiritual autobiographies - spirituality & ageing, mental silence vs mindfulness?
Need time to process it all.
In the State Library waiting for the conference dinner-never attended one before, but thought I would investigate.

Every one is on holidays in July - Me too!

Most of the church, work and friends I have are going AWOL.
One person has supposedly got swine flu, plus school hols and winter escapes.
Me too!
Cairns here we come.
Computer playing up again today, plus I feel slow and tired.
Still I am here.
- Mine eyes have seen the Glory of the Lord - battle hymn sung this morning - take up your sword, brother against brother, husband against wife etc.
Glory, glory, hallelujah - his truth is marching on.

My dog Oompa and threads of my memory played out in mneumonic.

Locked out of my computer today - ?Doesn't like me anymore?!
Using someone elses.
Very tired this morning - had a nap
Now done some care plan stuff.
Cold, wet and windy outside.
Mentally overloaded from yesterdays experiences.
So many ideas!
Peoples questions, but my favourite exchange was when Bob Ellis spoke in his recommendation of chiropractors, which worked for him, his dog Oompa and his Libido - which was stated in capital letters.
I then went on to see a heavy play called Mneumonic - still unravelling that.
Still too tired to explain.

A Psalm - calling out

Festival of Ideas
Mneumonic
Man's Search for Meaning - Viktor Frankl
Spirituality & Health conference
Lit Review
Almond Blossom
Girl's Brekkie
A psalm - calling out
Night night.....................

Watching the funeral for MJ after a busy day

Made all sorts of enquiries today.
Negotiations.
Tired.
Going to watch the rest of the funeral/tribute to MJ.

But I still want my own desk...........

We are family, we are one.
Songs stay in your head.
Talking about social justice and being politically active.
Write a proposal............
Gardens, notice boards, promotions.
Now I am at work, one of the few on deck.
Would love to spend the whole day writing.
Get it happening.
A desk.
A computer.
My room.
Truth be tell, I prefer to write out of the house.
Which I am doing now, of course.
But I still want the desk.............

Lifetimes converge again!
News that my sister has connected with someone I knew at my old school.
Having trouble actually recalling who??
But I am curious, a lifetime has passed, well 3 decades................
A lot to catch up on.
Melbourne still means a lot to me.
Just about to visit my mother-in-law via the supermarket and Jaz & Hungry Jacks.
Some tired people at church this morning.
Say a prayer for the tired and worn out souls.

Lifetimes converging

Insurance headaches. What car, how much? Who's driving, fill out forms, make calls.
Hassles.............................
On a totally different topic....
Family connections however loose - are still there.
My dad left it all in the too hard basket.
But I have tentatively made some reconnections. Like a lifetime has happened to all these people and somehow there is still this blood connection.
My uncle George passed away recently.
Talked with my cousin Chris & Fred. Have not had any contact with Fred for probably 3 decades.
Still have to call Stephen, who hasn't been home when I have rung.
Members from aunty Grace's family attended the funeral, but not aunty Kath's.
I had no contact with any of them when dad died - apart from a brief conversation with Chris and my cousin Tony.
Uncle John did not attend the funeral, despite it being his only surviving brother.
Lifetimes occasionally converge

Comfort & Grief

Pain & healing.
Grief & comfort.
Thoughts?
In the midsts of suffering God is with you.
God alone is enough.
Being whole can be an answer to prayer for healing.
You still have things to learn about God and yourself and sometimes suffering does in fact make you stronger.
I can always remember someone - who was it? who said when a woman loses her mother it is a real turning point - you can no longer throw everything over your shoulder.
It is a tough blow to take.
God gave me a family to take care of, so I was quite literally so 'on the go' I couldn't just grind to a halt.
Grief does come in waves - that is something else I recall a workmate saying - Michelle - and it is so true, you can be standing in a shop or watching a TV Show and it will roll over you.
There is a feeling of unfairness and sadness.
Being sad is allowed.
I tried to fit in a song that I related to in a worship plan I am doing for tomorrow, but it was too hard to obtain the song.
These Small Hours by Rob Thomas -
Let it go,
Let it roll right off your shoulder
Don't you know
The hardest part is over
I recall my first day back to work after my Dad's death and funeral.
I remember standing in a newsagency in the Arkabah shopping centre, on the way to somewhere, or just getting some lunch, can't remember - anyway, this song came on in the shop and I just felt my legs feel like water - it was a tough day. Truth be known I may have just gone to the shops to get out for a while.
I am going to review all the bible readings for tomorrow.
Yey, though I walk through the valley of death, you God will be with me.

I'm Talking About the Man in the Mirror

What a deluge of grief today for Michael Jackson.
TV, radio, internet and print media scrambling to make sense of an unexplained event.
Behind the scenes the grief must be intense for family members, even estranged family will feel a loss.
There is a strange feeling of mixed emotions when a tarnished icon dies. There is part of me that doesn't want to believe he was capable of child molestation, but another that says he quite clearly stepped over the line.
My favourite song was 'Ben' achingly innocent, take me back along way.
As has been commented in the media, he was born into show business and has certainly died in the spotlight.
The spotlight will be intense for the next few weeks- how will he really be remembered?

I got a Whopper!

8 out of 8 in my footy tips - yes!

Car decides it won't go - time to get a new one?

Car decides to randomly stop working after music lesson.
Mechanic can't get it going, so it is towed to another mechanic to look at in the morning.
Result two hours gone and connection with two of the neighbours.
The good news is it wasn't too serious - $95 for a faulty switch, ? what switch, that does what???
It does pay to be in the RAA.

Glorious Irises

Am I inspired about organizing my tax return?
Filling out insurance claim forms?
Cleaning and ironing?
Not likely.
I am looking forward to an Adelaide day on Wednesday.
Planning a worship service - except for the small matter of illiteracy on powerpoint.
Reading 'Unpolished Gem' & other saved gems.
Rediscovering my oven.
Enjoying a winter walk.
Fossicking in the op shop.
Setting up my own study - yes!
Thanks to my friends for the friends picture, movie tix, note paper and irises - glorious.

Demystifying Schizophrenia

Doing a pre-workshop activity on writing for publication.
How about Demystifying schizophrenia.
The name schizophrenia is so hard to spell and write and the stigma still so great.
Psychosis in remission sounds a bit better - but still like a death sentence.
Needs to be given a more hopeful outlook - research paper pending...

Lady Grey tea & Lemonade Scones

Christened my new oven,
Made cucumber sandwiches.
Discovered Lady Grey tea at the age of 49.
Good turn out-:
Thankyou ladies.
Two people remembered the book swap, but I know the right books found their new owners.
Save the bubbly for another day.
Tired this afternoon - blurry thoughts.

Tales of sleep disturbances from the worrier

Status anxiety.
Accounts that are 'locked in' immediately.
Death of my uncle George.
Calls about worship planning.
Arranging violin graduation - times two.
Arranging for purchase of new school shoes.
Getting licence for son, learners for other son in waiting
Booking holiday to Cairns
Follow up phone calls to Sister.
Applying for conferences
Hosting a high tea
Ordering a 'D' String
Going to an extra violin lesson and forfeiting a film night
Buying more books
Work struggles
Worry wears you down

Credit card hustle

Lets bounce this credit through the roof!
Oven, bed, camera, watch, flights, car service, accommodation, licence, shoes and er.... entertainment!
Lots on offer.
Going to pay a few other boring bills and get my book club book and book up some cup cakes.
I have consulted a few travel agents and yes I am still alive, but I am always, always looking for the best offer.
Settled on Jetstar and a 2 for 1 Hilton Cairns deal, which includes breakfast.
Bonza!
Now just have to do the tours - reef, rainforest and rail.
I have a silly habit of using Jenny Esots in third person terms- Jenny Esots is on track to spend, spend, spend.
Didn't include conference fee.
Jenny get that tax organized now.

It's a bleary birthday morning..................

Jet lagged from too many commitments.
Work demarcations, neighbourhood garden dilemas, school exam blues, orchestra SOS's, market day roster assignment, church band presentations & domestic delivery angst.
I haven't mentioned the birthday high tea, that I am going to go all out for.
The Desgin a Christmas Poster Competition I set up.
Things I love at the moment-:
Wet dog kisses from Holly-Roo
Wet moustache kisses from my hubbie
My new friend Suzanne who is doing the cleaning - a lot better than I can.
Winter days that are ice cold
Reading on the train into Adelaide
Seeing a film at the Palace Nova, just about to see Is Anyone There? With Michael Caine.
My continued quest for the daily double shot soy latte (Cibo today in Rundle Street - good coffee, but not enough quantity, plus noisy radio/music on).
In the process of booking a holiday in Cairns - 7 days in July - why not?!!!!

Late night TV - Thank goodness for the ABC.

Rita Hayworth as Gilda.
x3 B Movies
Vera Drake - ultra serious dirge mvoie on SBS
Foyle's War on the ABC - Top Class stuff, except I am tired. Worth staying up for however, or I could tape it or borrow the DVD. Jenny check the library catalogue now.

Dancing as medicine

I 'm getting good at titles(!)
Was at the Seacliff pub last night for a few farewells.
Very loud music - a bit on the distorted side.
Some tunes sounded vaguely familiar - some not.
I moved around a bit in a resemblance of dancing - but I am not that good at dancing 'with' people, if you know what I mean - I like to groove along, but not in close contact with some one else - too nervous? self concscious?? yeah all that.
Money was lost, a tatoo was got & people were yelling or was it singing - I had two Stella's and left about 11.15 ish.
Anyway it was too loud to get caught up in knots about work - so that's a good thing.
Cheers again.

Art & spirituality - the blood of life

City Soul is a new off shoot of the Uniting church that meets to discuss art and spirituality.
Sounds right up my street!
Jaz is exhibiting soon - June 23rd opening at Studio 22 in Waymouth Street.
I will be there.
Also going to see a film called Disgrace based on a book by JM Cootzee - 891 opening - I've found a new place to dwell with premiere movie tix - now that Dymocks seems to have dried up.
A am on bonus schemes at a number of movie places ie the capri, Marion Megaplex, Palace Nova and have entertainment vouchers for Wallis.
Thinking about blood - that thick, messy substance that keeps us together in more ways than one.
Have also been thinking about Christmas - have an idea for a design a Christmas Poster competition - 1. Great exposure for the festival 2. I have run out of ideas(!) 3. I don't have Jasmine as my fallback anymore 4. We will hopefully have art work to display at the festival.
Cheers.

So sad the song

Gladys Night and the Pips.
Haven't heard it in ages.
Will just have to request it

Being flexible and frustrated at the same time...

Have been entirely flexible with my working hours today.
Having managed to squeeze in my first trip to Gold Class cinema.
Saw this purely because it fitted in time wise.
Angels and Demons thriller - it was nearly the end of the Vatican, Rome and the pope in one day(!)
Then had to cope with the immense frustrations of being involved with the neighbours collective finances - quotes were sought and locked in before it came to light that some one else had had gutters delivered - was I angry?
I feel it is going nowhere with getting finances in order - but I have restrained myself from writing a nasty email.
The politics at TPC are also festering. With two people off on stress leave.
I care but I am also mindful that my job is to be a professional, not a nanny.
Drinks for some farewells tonight.

Buying the right oven

is not so easy.
Will I get free standing or wall.
White or stainless steel.
Grill above oe below oven.
Tray fittings with detachable metal or not.
Price?
Yeah, it's only been 6 months without one(!)
Just had a frustrating time trying to access my work email, I knew it would be futile.
Anyway i will shortly get a hard drive computer and find out how to access the damn emails.

Death as poetic moment

Apparently death can be poetic.
But I don't think people often manage to program their whole dying expereince into something poetic.
Getting the energy to plan every part of your life is unrealistic.
It can't even be done when your're well(!)
I have 7 minutes left on this computer.
I do recommend The Household Guide for Dying by Debra Adelaide - not that I could relate to it all, but it was constucted so well.
Loved the little Dear 'Help Me' letters.
People looking for domestic secrets and help for their love life.
Not that I am ever likely to get hung up about the perfect soufle.

Tales of life without my recycling bin.

Recycling crisis at number 27.
It just dissappeared last recycling day and failed to come back to me.
Have been heard begging to the council to deliver another one before Monday, or else it would be a months worth of recycling banked up. And I recycle a lot.
More than one bin can handle, but I make do with one.
It was pretty obvious it was mine - plastered in stickers.
So I have ceremoniously put a new sticker on the new bin - 'wot flies'
Just how people do a cruise by for recycling bins I don't know.
Apparently they are wanted for storage of water, so the policeman told me when I reported it.
Have strated reading my 4 cent book.

What's the deal on hair styles

I have got a long awaited appointment tomorrow.
Have never been a big fan of the hairdresser.
Probably since my mum made me have a 'proper' hair cut which I think made me look like a boy, and that is a traumatizing experience.
You'd think I'd have got over it by now wouldn't you.
So I don't want hair in my face anymore - whatever the style is, it drives me to distraction and I end up lumping it into a head band - which looks pretty severe.
Hopefully the time in Norwood will be fun ie retail therapy(!)

A cosy place

Here in my cosy home I have managed to get the lap top operational.
I have one more shift until five days off.
Rest for the body, mind and soul.
Am investigating signage for Willunga Unitng Church.
Invites for a high tea - number 49 birthday.
Gutters for the barn.
Painting two bedrooms.
Reading a half a dozen novels, including finishing The Household Guide to Dying.
The girls over for book club last night - what is going on with the font?
Yikes, computers have a vicious streak in them!

1 cent for a book & more......

Yes I paid one red cent for a book ordered on Amazon - but postage was about $15 I think.
So the book I got for four cents at Target is the real bargain.
Don't know if it was a mistake, but when I got home I looked at the receipt and yep, 4 cents - The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galazxy - a book I have been meaning to read for ages.
It was a discount day, but 4 cents??
The Amazon one is a book I read over half of for book club and then had to hand it back. It was then found to be only available in the book club set - so what to do?
It is not exactly a current release - but I want to know how it all comes together.
The Master Burchers Singing Club.
So miss my reading days while on Jury Duty - so many books.
Book club kicks off tonight at my house.
- I know I can do this hospitality thing, without going insane(!)

Free at Last! End of the Stop/Start month.

Jenny Esots has finished jury duty.
It has been a stop/start month.
Not really having a home - shuttling between the Samuel Way Building in Adelaide via car & train and TPC workplace.
Yes I will miss the Adelaide wanders, the coffee and reading time, felt just so decadent(!)
Now I'll have to get my 'me' time other ways.
Definately going to do more city wanders on my days off - Palace Nova here we come.
Will write more on the jury process - Sunday Mail due a letter.

Just gone digital!

It's mid 2009 and I have finally taken the plunge and got an SLR Digital camera.
$899 Canon @ Ted's in Rundle Street.
And so now to experiment.
So many other items and things on the to do list.
Have been continuing to shop up a storm - fun days.

The Ashes in the wardrobe

Just reading 'The Household Guide to Dying'
Thinking about gravesites and the pro's and con's.
This is mainly because I have the ashes of my mum and dad in my wardrobe.
Is this appropiate?
I am inclined to agree with the siblings regarding gravesites being obsolete.
Know of so many people who never visit them.
But still I would like to think there is a peaceful place to remember them by.
The question has always been where - where indeed.
Both parents having not stipulated this - which begs the question even more that it is not neccessary.
But still there are these ashes in the wardrobe???????

Family Memories

Shared pain?
Old hurts
Misgivings and missed opportunities
There must be some light
Why do always see the wrongs magnified?

Doing time with TPC and the problem with chain emails

How ever well intentioned a chain email can invoke underlying hostility and irritability - like why me? What gives? Do I have time for this?
So I decided to send a recipe exchange one on - seems harmless enough, but one person has a pathological objection and the other is peeved. I suspect many will just bin it. The other consideration is the calibre of who sent it to you, and I value my friend Jane.
Oh well, by the way I have never found out how to do spell check on this blog....
S'posed to be on jury service however it is a bit of a non event this week.
I really look forward to my wanders in Adelaide.
Maybe Friday????

Port Fairy in King Tide

Raging waves power up the coast.
Leaving footpaths covered and locals podering unseen levels of the water.
Such a quaint spot - no overt tourism.
The wharf, cafes and lots of blue stone.
Had to check out the local library - old building, well set out with tables and chairs and places to read - Willunga please take note.
Would have loved to do a bit of fine dining.
Maybe next time.
Oh and it was a family reunion.
Shared memories, only different views.

Things to do in Port Fairy......................

1. Have a family reunion with brother and sister.
2. Have breakfast, lunch and dinner in a cafe/restaurant
3. Go for walks
4. Remember & celebrate

Long drive there and back. 6 hours each way.
I would really like it if I had a relative here who could take the boys to the cinema.
Julian hasn't got his licence yet, nearly, and Jaz has licence but no car.
My latest film recommendation is 'Mary & Max' bitter sweet story involving mental illness and 'therapeutic interventions'.
In the meantime can you organise the finances of the WGV and make a policy statement about public encounters in Willunga Uniting Church.
Also follow up school uniform issues, cleaning the floors music practice and plans for conferences and workshops and seminars and choir etc.
Yours in anticpiation.
Also received my licence back from a chemist I had not recollected giving it to. Too late I'd already ordered another one.

Shopping up a frenzy with my loyalty card

Why do I feel guilty when I spend?
Have bought a few clothing items recently.
Black vest and jacket - Ezibuy-no loyalty card - used to be Flybuys.
Skirt and two skivvy tops - Katies-loyalty card.
Woolen stockings - Myers-loyalty card.
A scarf from Just Jeans-loyalty card.
Doc Martin boots - Trims-loyalty card.
An accumulating points all over the place.
Things still to buy-:
A new watch - old one died after 25 years - broke timer off on the plane to Melbourne, trying to change the time.
More woolen stockings.
New oven - plus kitchen.
New computer - I'm in the library again.

The Jury Room

I'm in it now, not literally but for the month of May.
I am now a commuter to Adelaide.
Got the express train and then walked to the Courts. Not that far.
Had brekkie at the Hilton - $24. But got good value out of it.
Bananas, nutella a coffee to go and some danish.
Very nice selection including mineral water.
However the peppermint teea is not up to much.
In the State Library, having done my footy tips.
Some light rain outside.
Going to see the Wizard of Oz tonight at Noarlunga College Theatre, now called the Hopgood Theatre.
Better call Qantas, think I left my licence there last week.
Either that or the hotel.
Memory issues..............

Listening fatigue

This is what comes from listening as a vocation - is it just one too many problems left at your door. Yes you don't need all the answers, but do you?! It is hard to stop the wheels from turning - what if this, what if that???
Nearly time to go home - and I really feel like a night out - ie a local resturant.
Anyway....
Get on with emailing and auto cueing.

The Festiva has gone to heaven

Declared a right off - $300 to put a figure on it.
Jaz is now in the market for a new car of some sort....
10 years of faithful service. A good zippy little car, had its fair share of scrapes.
I have one and a half shifts before some time doing other things - yes!
Hoping to be able to piggie back on some activities after jury service ie films and gallery viewings.
Palace Nova here I come.
Any ideas about public relations/encounters for our local faith community?
I would like a notice board or too in the new hall, but one in the main street would also be a bonus ie like the environment centre. But where and how can I get some space?
Brain storm - Notice board new the rec hall? Outside the church hall? Space in a shop?
Keep thinking and praying and talking.

The aroma of cats piss tea!

This morning the aroma of cats piss permeated the office. Gound to be a herbal Twinning tea bag - not sure what flavour - but one to avoid, me thinks.
Otherwise dealing with dramas of wooden floors and daughters car bingle.
Seem to be quite alert for four hours sleep.
Grey skies and rained all night - praise be.

The muddle headed woman who nearly missed her flight home

I recall visiting many airports in my time. Hearing the assorted messages over the loud speaker.
'Ty Wong please go to gate 5 immediately, your flight is ready.'
etc etc
Never for one minute believing I would be on the receiving end of one of these messages. Holding a plane up for 20 minutes.
Wrong gate, quite easily down if you are tired and have a case of cysitis - help!
I did arrive home safely and now am about to wander home to check on the cleaner.
That's right, a cleaner.
The first cleaner I have had in 15 odd years.
It was time to bite the bullet and admit I was getting too cranky with all that needed to be done.

Found my blogging bug again.
Sitting in the foyer of the Amora Hotel in Richmond.
Just about to go on a river walk with my Jerry.
Have been getting an insiders look around Scotch College in Hawthorn.
A place I could never have contemplated going to-:
1. It's an all boy school(!)
2. Way out of our league in price
3. Way out of our location zone, it is the Malvern, Kew, Glen Iris well heeled who attend.
Anyway have been able to lose myself in a good book 'The Time We Have Taken'.
And look around the laneways of Melb. Go in a futile lottery in an attempt to win front row tix to Wicked.
Did I mention that I am here with 3,000 or so others for the World Suzuki convention.
What's Hot List
Hotel buffet breakfasts
Room service cheese platters
Annie's Lane Rose
Qantas - free magazines and they give you food & drink
Melb tram network
Daily ordered packed lunches
The lawn manicurists at Scotch
Daily bus to the convention
Ian Potter Gallery, especially The Shared Sky exhibition
What's not
Finding out which way to put in my met card(!)
Flinders Street station public toilets
Riding a bike with lightning fast bike commuters on route the Riverwalk.
And so to publish post...............

Melbourne Revealed

We all have our own private Melbourne experience. Which authors grab hold of, like Helen Garner.
With those wonderful images of Melbourne that seep into your soul. Her latest book 'The Spare room' is excellent for that very reason. I was transported back to Collins Street as if I was standing there.
As an ex-Melbournite I have now built in my own private Adelaide experience and love it when authors expose this. eg Anne Bartlett in her first book called 'Knitting' stumbles along the laneways of Parkside.
My Melbourne recollections are to be relived shortly on a rare trip back 'home'.
You can't get the Melbourne out of me it seems.

Cleaning can wait.....

Market wander - Autumn Fair - Meet the pollie at the Rose Garden.
Home for an omlette - need to find some new ideas with omlettes.
Off to work.
Bought the Age newspaper and intend to immerse myself in it.
Going to Melb. in a weeks time approx.
In other news my house is a mess - what's new!
Is it really that important.
About to go through my in tray.
Tomorrow - change clock - do flowers - clean church - do sunday school - Palm Sunday - rehearsal visit for chamber orchestra - church congregational meeting - work.
So I guess the housework can wait.
Either that or I'm going to get this one off clean done.
Overdue for a movie too.

Public Encounters

Easter cards are in the post.
Letter and greetings.
Much discussion today about the seven leader jobs.
Who will do the administration leadership?
Who is keen on intentional outreach?
What about pastoral care.
Here I am sitting at a computer, thinking of writing about why I want to be the leader of public encounters.
The strange thing is I found myself writing about why people fall away from their faith.
Talking yesterday it seems that this can be a clensing thing - like a bushfire - new growth emerges. Young people in particular have to find time to find out who they are.
To make every encounter with the church a positive one - and promote our faith as life affirming.
That is the mission statement.
Hold the name of Jesus up high - and people will come.

Roy's Retreat - Into the mystic in Willunga

God alone is enough.
All mystics speak about an expereince if union or oneness with God.......All mystics tell us that the words or images we use to describe union with God are inadequate...........Mystics, like prophets, are not appointed by any religious authority to fulfil their role as mystics.....Mystical union with God is not an expereince reserved for some very special and privileged people.
I found myself seeking God.
I found images of children.
I found a vivid image of a circular hole in the gound, the size of a well. With a tan coloured earth.

It was like an up close camera was investigating it all.
I am longing to go on another retreat.
Now at work, on the computer for another 45 minutes before earth hour commences.
Turn off all life support systems!
Shut down cool off....LRB

A mojito to go please

I haven't been to a resturant that good in a long while.
Auge which is pronounced L g - work it out.
The ambience, service and food was superb.
I did however blow my cool level by not knowing how to pronounce Mojito - it MoHito(!)
Anyways they didn't have any mint - so no MoHito.
I would love to go back there - tomorrow.................
Alas it is off to work we go.
Happy 16th my Jerry.

The benefits of staying in bed all day..................

As a confirmed night owl I struggle to get to the Willunga Farmers market - Saturday mornings.
I sluggishly get in the shower and hastily slap on some lipstick before I get there.
Racing around the stalls before they shut and grabbing a double shot latte.
My new favourites are the tomatoe and cucumber stall, sultana grapes - a few kilos, and the bread stick. Today also got garlic foccacias. My other favourtie thing to buy is a tussie mussie herb bouquet - the last one I bought had bay leaves and mint with yellow flowers - it looked and smelt divine.
To make matters worse it is horribly humid.
It is just so nice to stay in bed - I am just going to have a day when I stay in bed ALL day.
The benefit to me - some down time, rest, reflection, reading, need I say more?

If you were mine? subtitled finding your way back to where you came from

The older we get the more we go in search of what made us.
I also realise how similar I am to my mother. How we seem to repeat a pattern of sorts without realizing it.
Miss you mum - so many things we could have gone through. A vastly different generation. But such an inate connection.
Looking forward to seeing my daughter soon - to buy things with and chat ie get a few computer things and who knows what else - go wild with that plastic card.....

Nostalgia rules!

Memories of the Garden Village, The Adelaide Review, Almond Blossom Festival, Children's milestones, Willunga Uniting Church as it celebrates the opening of its community hall, local venue Christina's post Vanessa's/Willy Hill.
Have written about them all, in long hand at the hairdresser and on flopy disc at the library.
Still have trouble settling to do writing at home - need an office/study.
Get one now!!
3 minutes remaining so I am off.

Cup cakes, farewells and growing up

Choc mud cup cakes today for the farewell of Janice.
Sunday purchased a lumberjack cup cake which had a butterfly on top for Jasmine.
Farewells and anxiety
Catch ups and plans
Excursions and things to look forward to.
Good Friday lunch with Ilze, Uldi and Sue, Eric and Emmaline.
May rendevouz with brother Steve and Lisa
April travels to Melb.
Time to write notes and tidy up.
WGV Meeting tomorrow
Worship planning for Sunday
Posting more invitations for hall opening soon.
Did I mention that I am on night duty then?!
Bring on the cup cakes I say!

Did I mention that there are figs on the tree?

Dusky brownish lucsious figs. Dripping with musky milky liquid.
The garden village common is full of fruit and little trails.
On the lap top, which I find difficult to use.
Thank you and good night.

A childhood is something you can't escape from

A synthesis of a book I didn't much like called 'Tomorrow'.
So much so I didn't get around to finishing it.
Now have approximately a dozen books lined up.
Obtained from-:
Dymocks - using up points on loyalty card - The Bean Patch
Angus and Robertson - using book voucher from Christmas -High Fidelity
Amazon - The South Beach diet - mail order
Book Club - Tomorrow - didn't finish
Imprints - Book voucher -When you are engulfed in flames
Willunga Library - recommended author - When you were mine
Double Day book club - Almost Moon - strange choice
With Love to the World - daily devotion
Plus the odd impulse by and book exchange, sale etc
Eyes bigger than face....................................................

ps. My first live Oscars

What a gas!
Sitting in my nightie. Home from night duty.
Got to see all the Oscars - four hours!
Wonderfully happy to see the results as they happen.
Couldn't be better.

Princess dresses and the fun in giving

I saw the mosst beautiful princess dresses in of all places - the window of a health food store in McLaren Vale. I could just see my niece wearing one. Sort of like a fairy princess/hollywood star on the red carpet. They had only two in her size - which were balck and white stripes with a slash of red. Or a very regal cream with brocaide - almost bridal. I should tell her she is practicing to be a princess bride.
Going to see the family and Ilze on Sunday at the nursing home.
Other developments - new relatives found. Step siblings of my husband. More details will no doubt emerge. Hope to find out more family history from Ilze.
Jaz continues to do outstandingly well in her move to a unit.
Washing machine installed.
I intend to visit on Sunday as well - with another housewarming gift. Most likely food, plus a calendar on Space.
So I have been spending a bit too much?!
Arranging accommodation and airfares to Melb. for April violin convention.
Excited about going to Melb. Accommodation sounds good. Riverside spa. YES!
Talk again soon.

Who is doing the dishes and other quandries

Home renovations are being contemplated.
But the domestics keep on ticking along, with no particular place to go.
On nights and this will be the last for many a moon.
Looking forward to being home for the Oscars live on Monday. For the USA it's Sunday night.
But I'll be in my PJ's on the lounge with Holly - Roo.
I am one of those Oscar fanatics. The red carpet is so seductive, but I really appreciate the calibre of the films.
Would like to go to the farmers market tomorrow, just briefly.
Somehow would like to get to church on Sunday.
Have looked at my holiday snaps on the Ghan - I look well rounded.
So much for the South Beach diet plan.........................
Really struggling to stay focused here.
So may have to let my mind wander off.

A Soy Double Shot Latte Please - my addiction is my strength

I am doing a consume survey on the best soy double shot latte.
Coffee club Noarlunga - Can be quite slow, I usually get a take away, so don't like the styrine container. Overall 7 out of 10 for flavour and nice and hot.
Coffee Club Marion - Quite good, but quite a public spot. 6.5 out of 10.
Market 190 - Great location and friendly atmosphere. Coffee can needs to be hotter and lacks bite, 6 out of 10.
Blessed Cheese - Tops for coffee, plus has the daily papers. 8 out of 10.
Three Monkeys - The best of the best - service, atmosphere and flavour. YES! 10 out of 10.
Farmers Market - very busy market, so don't often stop for coffee. okay 6.5 out of 10.
The Green Room - Have only had plunger coffee, don't think they do other coffee? LOVE the room, paper selection and china. Quirky and worth a long stop on a Saturday morning in Willunga - 9 out of 10.
Have really splurged in the last fortnight - my addiction is my strength!!

Train adventures into the desert and stories about loss

Loss is everywhere at the moment.
So many houses, towns, animals and lives lost.
My cousin and his family have no home. They also lost the zephyr car that had been a family tradition. Paridoxically my aunt appears more accepting than I am about this - the need to move on.
The indiginous people move on all the time, there's is not a permanent life. They have few posessions and keep very little of the things we take as a given. The huge larder and mass of clothes and furniture. Not to mention all the electronical and electrical gadgets we can't live without.
So do I buy lots of these things or do I go on another train journey(!)
I would love a winter soujorn on a train - quick winter is almost over in the Northern Hemisphere.
Help - 6 minutes left on this computer.
For some reason I find it so much more productive to write in a library, or work, or somewhere else. The library will be closing in 5 minutes.
So goodbye.
I have meetings and photos to take. Films to watch.
7 Pounds - Hollywoods facination with giving your life for others. But death by jellyfish????????

Emotional carnage at work

For sure. Mental health is an emotional minefield.
What is best for someone who can't make there own way in life.
It seems that there is a huge amount of people who sometimes confer about this and somehow I am part of it all.
So looking forward to going on the Ghan and seeing more of this vast country.
They are really getting flooding rains up North, so it will really be the Green Season.
To do -:
Buy princess dress
Get pix back from framer ie indiginous art
Talk about scheduling Take Ten
Talk to LS about brekkie
Type up brekkie program and WGV
Finish book - Almost Moon
Order book six Suzuki for Jerry
Ta Ta

Heating up and cooling off as a constant struggle

Constantly waiting for that hint of an evening breeze, even better a cool change.
Temp is usually 25 plus at any given time, up to 45.7.
Anyway I have found my way to the library to cool down.
My anxiety has abated and I feel renewed.
Haved seen many films - Milk, Gran Torino and Doubt this week.
Still would like to see Yes Man and The Changeling.
Two power failures for the week.
One spent reading by candle light with hot wax flicking on to me.
Excellent read - A thousand splendid suns
Waiting to submerge myself in a new book
Boys off to school tomorrow, me to work, and so it goes.

Making decisions is tough

Frustration and anxiety. Heat and anticipation.
Hugh sigh of relief to be on a few days of annual leave.
Work is tough, working with people, making decisions.
Tough enough to make me re think things too many times.
Take a break and live.
Sigh...............................
I will return.

Jenny Esots prepares for the year ahead....

Yeah well I'm thinking a bit about life in 2009 and beyond.
I s'pose I should get my diary up to date and follow up loose ends.
Appointments and lessons, books and writing I said I would do.
The story of the Willunga Garden Village.
Eulogy for Tom Strout and Jim Pitkin
The story of Willunga Uniting church
It does feel strange to be the elder - ie have lived at the Garden Village for nearly 20 years.
Attended the church, have children nearing the end of their school years.
Have Jerry attending violin for close to 8 years
Been a nurse for I don't know how long
Look forward and look back - find the meaning - before it's too late.
Thanks,
Jenny Esots

Confessions of a bookaholic daydreamer at the Tour Down Under 2009(!)

Too many books, too little time.
Cycalists have been racing around Willunga, including Lance Armstron. Though not sure how you could see him in the flash of a moment they glide by.
Spoken to a lady from Melbourne who is watching the entire tour. An elderly man from Moana.
Friends Annette, Phil and Rachael, Cathy and girls, Marg and girls.
Have had regular pit stops at Three Monkeys, International food festival, Quarry market and the library of course, where I am now.
Perfect summer day.
Life sounds good on my blog diary, cos it is......
Lots on the to do list for the coming week, fun stuff.
Talking is therapeutic.
Here come the riders again.
See you when I next check in.

Jonah he lived in a Whale...

Well he lived there and reportedly ran up a big mini bar account and left without paying the bill.
Last seen on a beach somewhere heading towarads Ninneveh.
I found this blog the other day on google(!)
Have to go, but just thought I'd try and leave my name and see if it surfaces elsewhere.
Things are fine.
I have finished my first book for a while.
'When you are engulfed in flames.' by David Sedaris.
Think I could write at least as good.
See you again soon.
Regards,
Jenny Esots
aka Jenny Esots

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Fading fast.
Think.
Mind zapped...
Jani home with boys. Sounds like had a wonderful time.
Bought back 5kg of cherries. Which are not on my South Beach diet.
The hardest part of this health kick is not eating fruit.
I have a bit over a week to go on this part of it. Kinda of hard.
Just hoping to lose the jelly belly and spongy thighs etc.
Feels likle healthy eating except for the fruit ceasing.
I am missing Jani now.
Few emails today, so am dissappointed.
Watched 'Sicko' - which I really thought I knew, but it is such a horror to see, so much wrong with the good old US of A.
Talk again on this.

Paid to be an insomniac

That's right. I am a professional insomniac. It is 4.30am now and I am still tapping away on this computer. Still have things in the IN tray.
Letters, forms, emails, searches, paying bills, transfering money.
Say good night...................

The Gifts of Grief

Here I am again, on night duty.
Late last night I stayed up to watch The Gifts of Grief DVD.
Have waited for 18 months for it to be obtained - long story.
Worth the wait.
Six people relate their expereinces of grief. Well told, without hitting you over the head with its messages.
It starts off relating grief to being submerged in water.
I feel the loss of my mum and dad all the time. Things remind me of them.
Old songs, TV shows, phrases, hymns, places.
They are so much of who I am.
I need to write more about them.
My days of being fancy free are almost over.
Jani and boys due back tomorrow.
I went out today and saw the film Frost/Nixon - highly recommended.
Also shopped for quilts and comforters.
Knowing what I was looking for and going on a hunt.
Still have heeps of cleaning left to do - trying to get the ship in shape.
Blessings.